On August 3, I went in for two ultrasounds (one internal and one external) to examine whatever my doc was feeling a few days earlier. I was nervous about this appointment....partially for what i might see on the screen or the reaction of the technician. But mostly, i was nervous about peeing. I had to drink 32 ounces of water in the hour and a half before my appointment and i couldn't use the restroom for two full hours before the appointment!!! I pee A LOT.....prolly every 30-45 minutes! 2 hours felt like punishment.
By the time i got to the hospital i thought i was going to pee my pants. My appointment was at 4:00. I wasn't called in until 4:10. I was ushered to a changing room and changed into a very chic hospital gown. I was waiting there for such a long time that i started taking pictures with my phone of my best "model pose" and sending them to some of my friends to critique....i was trying to smile with my eyes. Finally (!) at 4:25, I was called back to the exam room where I met Alex, the technician, and he did the external ultrasound. Before we started I looked at Alex and said, in an attempt to be funny (cause i was nervous and that's what i do), "I know you can't say anything, but i need you to tell me if you see a baby in there. Cause if you see a baby.....we have bigger problems."
"Why? Are you on birth control"
"Well.....gay. Thus, my dilemma."
He laughed and started the external ultrasound. This is the part where i had to really concentrate on NOT peeing...he had to press quite hard to get a good picture of my insides and i thought i was going to lose it!!! About three minutes into the external ultrasound, Alex asked if I was there to get images of my bicornuate uterus. I told him that i was there to get a picture of what was in there...my doctor and I were unsure. SURPRISE! Not only did i not know i had a bicornuate uterus - i didnt even know what that meant! I radded that to the mental list of things to look up when i got home. Alex was finished with the external ultrasound in about ten minutes and as soon as he finished, I jumped out of the bed and ran to the nearest restroom. I was so relieved!
For the internal ultrasound a woman named Sharon joined us....to make sure Alex was kosher... and we started the test. I did the best i could to make sense of the images on the monitor above my head. I asked Alex questions about what he was doing and he answered the best he could. I watched the screen as measurements were taken (110 mm....i need to remember that), he examined my ovaries and took sound images (the left one didn't have a "heart beat".....write that down, sarah), he labeled the masses (three total). I remembered the advice i got before my MRI in February: don't pay too much attention.....let the doctor interpret the data; but really didn't give it much heed.
After the tests were done, I took my time dressing and took a leisurely drive down to Corvallis for dinner with some friends. I had one of them convert those 110mm into inches...about 4.5. I vented. I listened to their stories about life. We had a good dinner and I made myself focus on the moment. I knew that my thoughts would be consumed with all of this news in the weeks leading up to my follow-up on the 25th so i wanted to focus on being with good company. The women i was with that night encouraged me to laugh and let me be real about the whole situation. I was nervous and scared. we sat in silence for a moment as someone tried to think of a way to lighten the mood after the gravity of the situation set in. I have three masses in my uterus....the largest is 4.5".
The doc's words were ringing in my ears: "if it is between 4 and 5 inches we are going to get aggressive."
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